Today I want to shine some light on a common issue in life, health, fitness, and people’s weight loss goals. Its FEAR. Let’s talk about what is fear and how to overcome the fear of change. A client I had this week was the inspiration for this post. She is representative of many people on their weight loss journey and is fighting fear on several fronts.
What is fear and how does it manifest itself?
Fear has been known as:
False
Expectations/Evidence/Experiences
Appearing
Real
Here is another acronym for fear that’s appropriate:
Failure
Expected
And
Received
Regardless of the acronym, fear comes down to our brain worrying about a scenario that hasn’t happened yet. It is our skewed perspective on a worst-case scenario, that’s very unlikely to happen.
Fear manifests itself in many ways. Perhaps it’s fear of change, fear that the journey will be “too hard”, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of missing out, or fear that they will injure themselves.
The type of fear doesn’t matter. The solution involves using your brain to shed light on the situation and get fired up, helping you to overcome the fear of change you want to make.
How to overcome the fear of change?
Change doesn’t happen unless we are fired up enough to make it happen. It happens when we’ve tapped into strong emotions about our situation, and about the future that we envision.
I’ve often said that change doesn’t happen until the “pain” gets to be too much
That pain can be physical, mental, emotional, or social, but when it gets to a certain threshold (that’s different for everyone) the change process becomes much easier. After the threshold is reached, excuses begin to fall by the wayside, and the action gets taken consistently.
Unfortunately for too many people, they are like the frog that gets boiled in the pot. They keep justifying and resetting their “pain threshold” until it’s too late, or a catastrophic situation wakes them up.
In order to avoid this potential future, we need to learn to get fired up earlier in the process
We need to clearly tap into what’s important to us and then get out of our own way to create the forward momentum we need. This means stepping over our excuses and moving forward regardless of that fear of yelling in the back of our heads.
It means acting in the face of this fear by doing what is right and what we know we should do…even though that voice dissension in our head might not want to. It means tapping into the negative aspects of your pain. Deciding you aren’t going to put up with them anymore.
It means creating a STRONG and EMOTIONALLY CHARGED vision of the future that you BELIEVE is worth fighting and sacrificing for!
We’ve all had these fears. It’s normal. So are change, transformation, bravery, pride, and action. In the past, I’ve wrestled with both fear of failure and fear of success. Many times I’ve avoided doing things because I might be seen as a failure. Other times, I sabotaged my results because I didn’t feel worthy of reaching the goal I had set.
I still catch myself in these destructive patterns every once in a while and am getting quicker at nipping them before they take hold.
What fears are you holding onto?
Back to the client I mentioned at the beginning…
This week we had a deep dive session into her emotions around what we were asking her to do (eat vegetables) and the fear she has about making the necessary changes. After the discussion, it became clear that her fear of change and fear of success are major barriers.
She expressed that she hadn’t made the recommended changes to her eating habits because:
-
She doesn’t like the taste of vegetables
-
She knew it would “be hard”
While she didn’t say it outright, many of the things she said during our conversation led me to believe she didn’t actually think she could be successful (because she had failed so many times in the past), and that she had always been overweight so couldn’t see her future self and the benefits clearly enough.
She had always been “the fat friend” and couldn’t imagine herself as “the fit friend”.
THIS is where we are focusing our effort:
On opening the door to possibility.
Having her get excited about that possibility.
On narrowing the guardrails so she can focus on simple, repeatable keystone habits.
On reframing that defeatist voice inside her head.
While this example is fat loss related, the concepts apply to any of the 4 Pillars of Performance. They are the foundation of how we help clients transform their mindset, habits, and life.
If you could use help in overcoming your barriers, we at FRESH! would love to help. Just book your complimentary Success Coaching Session here.
Make sure to follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube, for more health and fitness tips and tutorials.
We share the lifestyle we love!
Comments
Fear can be so damaging in our lives. I recently wrote a post on fear as well. I experience fear often and need to be reminded of how fear can take control and how to deal with it. Good read!
Thanks Cori! And good luck in overcoming your fears. We are all going down that road sooner or later.
I don’t think I have heard your second FEAR acronym. That makes a lot of sense. Being comfortable in our box is very common, and this is wise advice for how to overcome the fear of change.
Thank you Julie, and thanks for engaging!
I don’t like change and I grew up in a cautious family so I definitely let my fear get the best of me sometimes. For instance, we had gone to our ski trip last month when the weather was supposedly severe. There were moments during our trip that made me feel like I made a bad decision to go but the moments that I did take home with me after the trip was over was priceless. So as much as I don’t like change, I agree, we have to do what we can in order to jump certain barriers or to progress forward in life.
Maureen | http://www.littlemisscasual.com
Thanks for sharing that with us Maureen, and thank you for commenting!!!
great strategies for overcoming fear of change
Fear can be a challenging thing to overcome. These are really great tips and ideas on helping push past these emotions and feelings.
Thanks Debbie, and thank you for engaging!
It is so interesting how we humans keep ourselves trapped in unhappy cycles due to a fear of change. Thanks for sharing your tips
Great point Lisa! Thanks for commenting!
I try not to fear change, but it isn’t always easy. Sometimes it helps to have a feeling of control and change can feel out of control.
Exactly! Thanks for commenting Stephanie!
Fear of change is definitely stepping outside our comfort zone into the unknown, and the possibility of failure. It is good to embrace that change can be good!
Change is an essential part of life! Thanks for commenting!
Being that I am a creature of habit, change can be difficult. But as I have gotten a little older, I realize that it is absolutely necessary to grow. By changing my mindset, I have learned to embrace change as opposed to fearing it.
Great to hear that Lasonia, and thank you for commenting!
Another awesome article that is essential to the progress of any individual! Change is inevitable in this world! We need to adapt and adjust to cope up with this because without change there will be no development or growth!
Exactly Gervin! Thank you for commenting!!
Yyyeeesssssss! I love this. Meditation has helped me look at fear, without fear like never before.
Thank you for engaging Edgar!
This is something I need to work on myself! I have struggled with this off and on through out my life. Thanks for the information.
You bet Luna! And thank you for commenting!
Fear can get in the way of so many positive changes! These are all wonderful tips.
Thank you for engaging Patricia!
Change is a big fear of mine and always has been. But I’ve had to learn to adapt. I like to tell myself that while something may be a change now, it won’t be forever. Eventually, I’ll get used to it so it won’t seem like a change any more. I don’t know if that makes sense but it does to me.
While learning to adapt we build resilience and that is very important! Thanks for sharing and commenting Nyxie!
I’ll tell you honestly, I used to love changes but now that I’m 29 I am afraid of changes. May be I’m tired. But I really like your post about overcoming it.
Thank you for commenting. Embrace yourself, because changes are yet to come 🙂
Fear of change is something many of us struggle with. We need to identify what is holding us back and address it.
You are absolutely right Melanie!
Change is the only constant in the world. When we understand this then I think it helps us to easily embrace change and eliminate our fear.
Exactly Beth! Every day something changes! We change.
We all have fears in our lives and this includes fear of change. I love the Embrace, rather than avoid changing mindset.
Thank you for engaging Collen!
Figuring out what the fear is can be a good step to overcoming it. These are great tips and ways to do that. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for commenting Fransic!
I love the idea of clearly tapping into what’s important to you. I have this big goal but I keep sleeping on it and not really pushing to make it happen. I need to change that or nothing will change.
Good luck Rosey! And thanks for commenting!
These are great tips to overcome the fear of change. I have been going through a lot of changes in my life recently. Honestly, it’s been fun. I found that the less I worry about the fear of changes, I see a lot of confidence growth in myself.
Exactly Sonia! Life is full of everyday changes and if we embrace them as a natural part of life then we build resilience and experience! Thanks for commenting!